REEL GOLD

a smart, funny, strategic-as-hell membership for artists, agencies, and brands
who want to sell online without sounding like they're trying to sell online.

Let’s be honest


You didn’t build an actual business, brand, or art career
so you could lie awake at night wondering if you should post
a 10-slide carousel about “why I do what I do.”

You’re not burnt out.
You’re just deeply bored of being told to “speak from the heart”
by someone who learned marketing from a TikTok they half-watched
while reheating soup.

So here's what we're not going to do:

  • Talk about “showing up authentically” like that’s a strategy

  • Post daily “content pillars” that make you sound like a preschooler with a blog

  • Pretend you don’t have actual work to do

  • Rely on trends that died last Tuesday

Instead — here's what REEL GOLD gives you:

A ridiculously smart, slightly savage membership for people who want their content
to sell, speak, and not make them feel like they’ve joined a cult.

You get:

  • A course that explains real strategy, like an adult

  • A Caption Bot that writes better than your overworked brain

  • A Reels Bot that makes content planning feel suspiciously easy

  • A Vault full of tools that make you go “oh thank god”

All built for creatives, agencies, and brands who want their content
to work without needing to turn into a personal brand influencer overnight.

Let’s break it down:

The Course

Marketing strategy without the fake-it-till-you-cringe energy

Short, sharp video lessons. No fluff. No fake urgency.
Just actual answers to things like:

  • Why your content isn’t converting (and how to fix it fast)

  • How to talk about your work without sounding like a LinkedIn post

  • What TOF/MOF/BOF actually do — and how not to ruin them

  • How to position yourself without “finding your niche” in a forest

It’s like business therapy.
But you leave with a funnel instead of feelings.

The Reels Bot

For people who would rather crawl across hot gravel than lip-sync on camera

This is a real system.
It tells you:

  • What to film

  • Why it works

  • When to hook people

  • Where to put the damn text

It’s built on the viral structure I actually use —
not the one some guy with a ring light made up in 2022.

You’ll post reels that get saved, shared, and maybe even envied.
Without becoming the human version of a content calendar.

The Caption Bot

For when your brain has left the chat but the algorithm hasn’t

You put in a prompt.
It gives you strategic, funny, beautifully structured captions
in your tone of voice — not Karen-from-marketing’s.

Use it for:

  • Launches

  • Evergreen content

  • Subtle flexes

  • Actually selling things without sounding desperate

It’s like outsourcing your copy to someone cooler than you.
Who’s also a little mean. But in a helpful way.

The Vault

A growing library of things that make your content 90% easier and 100% better

Inside:

  • Swipe files (you will hoard them)

  • Funnel-tested caption templates

  • A library of examples, scripts, and clever little tools


    No upcharge.
    No fake scarcity.

This is for you if:

  • You’re an artist, agency, or brand with actual taste

  • You secretly love structure but hate being told what to do

  • You want content that works and sounds like you

  • You’re tired of pretending “engagement” is the goal

❌ Not for:

  • People who post “Just a gentle reminder 💗” as a personality

  • Coaches selling “confidence” in a carousel

  • Anyone who thinks Canva is a strategy

  • People who still say “Boss Babe” with their whole chest

 

The Investment

£1,200/year

That’s it.
No secret upsells.
No “VIP” tier where I pretend to care more.
You get everything:

✅ The Course
✅ The Caption Bot
✅ The Reels Bot
✅ The Vault
✅ Future updates
✅ And probably more you’ll find after clicking around, squealing quietly

 

Ready to post like a person who knows what they’re doing?

You could keep posting random quotes and calling it “branding” —
or you could join REEL GOLD
and let your content finally catch up to the level of your work.